<3
yep, all butterflies and buttercups and rainbows and dewdrops that shone brightly underneath the sunlight
but the most beautiful
still
her tears
yep, she cried
and that made me felt guilty; even a bit
those tears that I knew flows from happiness; but I couldn't help but felt like a shit
I made her cry;
even if it's out of... happiness? thankfulness?
I don't know, ask her
and what did I gave her?
so, yeah
as cheesy and corny as I am
I can't figure out other than... a wristwatch.
yep, another wristwatch.
last year, I gave her exactly the same thing
the same colour, thank God that the shape aren't the same
nonetheless, she cried.
and that almost made me tore apart too
I was in the brink of crying out loud
but I managed to held back
I mean, come on!
I have my own new wristwatch too =)
*sorry, a bit blurry =.=
well, I'm not the type to wear wristwatch
and I barely had any back then
what I had only a pasar malam one, or the most expensive I ever got
was from my maksu, she gave me when I got straight A's for my PMR
having something hanging on my hand is not something that I welcomed!
well, not her
she need it!
and oh, what a pleasant surprise, her's had ran out of battery
so, why not I bought her a new one?
she told me that she wanted nothing for her birthday this year
she throw me tantrums about how she never gave me anything
but I rather said, she never gave me nothing
she; was all I could ever asked.
so, yeah.
being the unromantic I am this year
there's no a long-written crappy cheesy note that accompanied the present
just a small note with a rushed handwriting early in the morning right before I dashed out from the door house since I was late (again) for school
still, she cried.
and that was heartbreaking-ly beautiful
awak, terima kasih sebab tak penat ucap terima kasih pada saya
bilamana saya yang sepatutnya ucap terima kasih pada awak
sebab awak beri saya peluang untuk merasa nikmatnya bersahabat
awak, tahu tak masa awak menangis tadi
saya pun nak menangis sama
sebab awak menangis kerana saya
saya tak tahu macam mana nak hadapi ulangtahun awak pada tahun hadapan
dan tahun-tahun seterusnya
sebab setiap tahun bahu saya lebam kena penangan penampar awak
just to make yourself clear
tipu kalau saya kata saya tak hendakkan apa-apa untuk ulangtahun saya pada tahun ini
dan apa-apa itu adalah kehadiran awak
cukup; itu sahaja
tak perlulah awak nak gusar memeningkan kepala memikirkan
apa yang nak diberi buat saya
sebab percayalah, saya dah lalui semua itu
and it was never a pleasant one
* I was not thinking of snapping a picture of her present, so yeah, no picture of her wristwatch
and that's suck (=.=)
even though she cried
her smile after that was beyond beautiful
and it worth the tears that I held back then
dan tak pernah cukup untuk saya ucapkan kepada awak
terima kasih
sebab jadi kawan saya
dan tak pernah mati di bibir saya untuk saya ulangkan pada awak
maaf
saya tak sempurna
satu lagi yang saya rasa awak perlu tahu
terbukanya pintu hati saya untuk menerima awak merupakan satu keputusan pahit yang paling cantik yang pernah saya buat
pahit; sebab sakitnya hati itu nak dibuka
cantik; sebab awak sembuhkannya
terima kasih, saya sayang awak
sangat-sangat.
Happy Belated Birthdayexpecting something for next year, sweetie <3
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